Commuting to work on an airplane week after week provides one with ample opportunities to peruse the stunning SkyMall Magazine – “located in the seatback pocket of the seat in front of you.”  Since the holidays are just around the corner, thought I would share some of my favorites!  God bless people with the creativity and drive to actually invent something…

First on the list is the ever-popular “Slanket” not to be confused with the “Snuggie”, though I am not really sure what the difference is between the two.  According to reliable sources (my good friend Lisa), you can wear it and use the TV remote at the same time without exposing your arms to cold temperatures.  Apparently, they have recently invented a ‘Slanket Siamese for Two’ – wow – what a great idea.  The only downside to the Siamese version is that it only comes in 2 colors.  Given it’s made out of a ‘polyester fleece’, I am guessing this thing should not get too close to an open flame.

Moving along to the ‘Litter Kwitter’ which claims to allow you to teach your kitty to use a human toilet in 8 weeks or less.  Now this one I might just have to buy myself.  If I never have to clean another litter box in my life, I would consider it a Christmas miracle.

For the regular traveler in your world, might I suggest “The UpRight Sleeper”.  As an added bonus, you have the option of purchasing a cover for it and by the looks of the purple one in the picture, I am sure that thing is flammable too.

Is there a man (or woman) who is interested in seeing themselves with facial hair?  Specifically a mustache?  Well, don’t allow the “Mustache Mirror” pass you by!  It’s a keeper!

Last but not least, introducing the “Dress-up Squirrel Magnets”.   These bad boys are delivered with 5 different outfits – how clever – paper dolls in the form of a varmit magnet.

Ahhhh, SkyMall Magazine…one more benefit to a weekly work commute…Which one would you pick?

I recently had the joy of commuting from Colorado to Northern Jersey for a solid year. Good news is, I enjoyed what I was doing, who I was working with and made damn sure I took full advantage of the close proximity to New York City.  Bad news is, I had to fly in and out of Newark Liberty International Airport (Newark).  If you want a guaranteed bad travel experience, fly in and out of Newark in the winter.  The only good thing about this airport is the Smash Burger in Terminal C.

One week this past Spring, I had a hideously stressful week at work so when I got to Newark to head home, I went on complete auto-pilot. I dragged my luggage to the United check-in area, printed my boarding pass, cruised through security without  a hitch, and made my way to the gate after a pit-stop at Crumbles for a red velvet cupcake.  When I got to the gate I plopped my tired, glassy-eyed self in a chair and looked at my boarding pass to make sure I didn’t get stuck in a middle seat.

At first I thought I was imagining things, but then I looked a little closer and realized I had a boarding pass for a Russian MAN in my hands.  Pretty sure I am not Russian or male. I had somehow picked up the wrong boarding pass from United and made it past the top-notch Newark TSA security team.  Good thing I followed strict protocol and packed my Burt’s Bees lip balm and my 3 oz hand lotion in a clear plastic bag – god knows those are dangerous objects requiring full disclosure.

Since my good friends at TSA failed to do their job properly and potentially placed others in harm’s way, I felt it was my civic duty to let them know things had gone awry. The supervisor was quite embarrassed and thanked me profusely.

All I could think about was how safe I felt flying the friendly skies that day and how I will never forget one of my most precious moments at Newark.